Moi Aussi!

Me Too! 

By now you are overly familiar with J. Sully (me) taking matters into his (my) hands to ensure J. Sully gets The Call for the 2015 Le Tour. If you’re not, besides being lucky, you can jump over here and understand what Le Call means. It is true that your time spent reading The Call will be 2 minutes and 30 seconds you’ll never get back, ever, but it is well worth it to put “Me Too!” (this story) into better context. ("Better" maybe to strong an adjective, anyway...) 

Le Tour. What’s it take to get The Call? Here’s what it takes: 

Cancellara warns of attack on the Tour De France Cobbles. 

Well guess what? Your hero, J. Sully will be on those same Cobbles that same day, and I too am going to attack! I (Sully) is going to attack like it is no one's business! All those other Tour Fans on our tour of the Le Tour are going to get attacked as J. Sully, like you see him do on Saturday’s at Stop Ahead Sprints, is going to go off the front, put the hammer down, pedal like there is no tomorrow, and dominate the tour, but not Le Tour! 

All towards getting THE CALL in June 2015! 

Yes! Moi aussi Fabian! Me too! 

Moi Aussi is Part 3 of the ongoing series of J. Sully making 1 last run at riding Le Tour!

Part 1: Le Call

Part 2: Le Weight

Le Weight!

In my last narrative we talked about The Call. A story of a “young man’s” (mine) dream of getting The Call to rush to France to fill out a Le Tour team that is in (very) desperate need of just 1 more rider to guide them through 21 stages of the greatest athletic event yet invented.

You should probably read that previous narrative first.

Thanks for coming back!

Why is it that J. Sully (me) has not gotten The Call? As we think back to the last story, which I’ve already mentioned you should have already read, you know I’m off to France, Belgium, even Luxembourg to take matters into my own hands. If THE CALL will not come to me, I am going to go find THE CALL. On this mission my goal is to ensure that THE CALL comes in 2015!

Today my friends, we have uncovered the first piece of Le Puzzle: Why has THE CALL not already arrived?

Le Weight!  

“What???”, you now find yourself thinking, “what has weight got to do with this?”

Well, let me tell you I am not only off to Le Tour (the cool kids say it that way, maybe) to hunt down THE CALL but I am following the media following Le Tour and I am studying just what it takes to receive THE CALL!

Flash back, if you will, to the 2013 Tour De France, the champion was a young man named Chris Froome, 6 Feet and 1 inch/1.86942984 meters tall and 157 pounds/71 kg in weight. Fast forward to now and in some people’s eyes Chris is not the favorite to repeat this championship effort in 2014 after his “collapse” in the Critérium du Dauphiné in early June. Mr. Froome fell from the Yellow Jersey to 12th overall in the 2014 edition of the Critérium du Dauphiné but still managed to come home as the winner of the Green Jersey.

(Sully, have you got a point to this story? Yes, I do. Hang on.)

In my eyes he, Mr. Chris Froome, remains the favorite for this year’s Tour De France (Americans say it like this), despite this collapse.

Why?

Here is why:

From this story at bicyling.com Mr. Froome is asked:

What is your plan between now and the start of the Tour de France?

And Chris answers:

We’re going to train in the Alps or we may do a little bit of recon in the Pyrenees. I’ve still got a bit of weight to lose before the Tour, maybe a kilo.

Read it again…

A Kilo.** A single, solitary, individual KILO!

Think back to The Call.

Can you see it? I can.

A kilo: 2.20462 US Pounds, 0.157473 Stone, 35.274 Ounces!

THE CALL is but 1 kilo from my grasp! I feel it. A trip to France. Cobbles, mountains, (some) wine and:

In 2015... In the midst of June... The phone will ring:

J. Sully: "Bonjour!, Bonjour!!!”

Heavily accented unknown caller, bored: "Is this J. Sully, of Stillwater MN, USA?"

J. Sully, now breathless and heart racing: "Yes! Yes it is!!! I AM J. SULLY!"  

Heavily accented unknown caller: “Thank you for taking my call Jay. Would you like to take 15 minutes to cut your insurance bill? "

Jump back to Part 1: Le Call
Jump ahead to Part 3: Mau Aussi 

**While it is true Mr. Froome mentioned the Alps, here in Minnesota we have not just Pawnee but also Chilkoot. I’m good on the climbing part. Right??

Le Call

It is la** time of the year when all over the internet you see nothing but stories of the world’s great cycling teams announcing their lineups for Le Tour. There is much talk of who can beat last years champion Mr. Froome. Everyone wonders if A. Contador will eat tainted Spanish beef. 

But, more importantly, it is the time of the year when J. Sully (me) waits for le CALL!

For those of you who follow the trials and tribulations of J. Sully (e.g. drop me), you know that for years, our hero, J. Sully (me) has been waiting for “The Call”. If you follow cycling and the race of the year, le Tour (the cool kids say it that way, maybe) you are familiar with “The Look” given from the “greatest” (in a physically/doped sense, not morally) rider in le Tour history to another infamous former “Champion” of what I consider one of the greatest athletic challenges of all time. (relive The Look, it really is amazing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MdMdJAdzpYQ at about 21 seconds), 

Yes, I’m still talking about the le Tour - where men wear tights and ride up the sides of mountains at a pace unimaginable to most. 

Le Call, in my mind, would be of the magnitude of Le Look!

The Call goes “something” like this:

J. Sully: “Hello?”

Unknown voice with accent, slightly harried: “Bonjour! Is this J. Sully?”

J. Sully: “Yes, Bonjour. Who is this?”

Unknown voice with accent, with slight relief in voice: “So wonderful to track you down. We need you! Le Tour begins in just a few days. Our lead out train is now short 1 man. Can you come?”

J. Sully: “Well, I do have work. And a bike club who depends on me on Saturdays.”

Unknown voice with accent: “But we need you. A 30 day contract. All the EPO you can use. Can you come?”

J. Sully, slightly hesitant: “Well, my French is not very good… and, as I said, my club, what about my club? I mean, the Coffee Ride...”

Unknown voice with accent cutting me off: “My friend! Jerseys! Bibs! Skin suits!! And an aero helmet too! We need you!”

In my (small) mind, for years now, I've dreamt of this call coming. As my years on this planet increase along with my cholesterol, my time to be called is shortening. Soon I will be as old as the riders in le Chilkoot Cycling Club who drop me every Saturday, and at that age, who's gonna call? I mean, besides the American Association of Retired Folks or whatever they're called.

So now is the time! Action is required! I am taking matters into my own hands! I am bringing the bike and bibs to them! If the mountains will not come to me, I will head to the mountains.

My friends I am off to Europe to show the world that NOW is the time for The Call. I will follow le Tour! I will ride the cobbles! I shall ride the mountains on Bastille Day! I shall be dropped by those from other lands! And I will send updates! (Um, sorry.)

In 2015... In the midst of June... The phone will ring:

J. Sully: "Hello, Bonjour!"

Heavily accented unknown caller, slightly bored: "Is this J. Sully? The J. Sully?"

J. Sully, now breathless: "Yes! Yes it is!!!"  

Heavily accented unknown caller: “Ah! We've found you. Would you care to cut your interest rate in HALF on your Visa?"

(jump to part 2 of this adventure)

(ps - I’ll put all the pics & video of my mission up elsewhere and try not to fill up chat. It’s bad enough having to watch me climb trying to catch you as you (thankfully) wait for me. I won’t force more of the same (looking, not waiting)!

** "Clever" use of French: https://translate.google.com/#fr/en/la

IronKoot: The "Ride" Report

IronKoot One

It begins with an idea. The idea is shared. The idea is thought highly of or in some cases not. Occasionally the idea is forgotten. Those who have done the forgetting are happy they forgot once they are reminded of the thing they had forgotten about, but now, alas, they are sad for having been reminded of the thing they had happily forgotten. (What’s this about again?)

Or maybe they just missed the email? It is simply both confusion and confusing.

IronKoot One followed this same pattern. A slightly balding gentleman somehow with the nickname “Sully” had an idea that he likely stole (the idea for the ride, not the nickname) from someone else. He none-the-less presents this idea as his and discusses this idea with board members who run the ever efficient Chilkoot Cycling Bicycling Club, CCBC, and then this Sully “cyclist” fires the email with the idea of this IronKoot to the club. The idea now heads out over chat. And the members of CCBC roll their eyes, slam closed the lids of their laptops, drop their fancy, yet oversized Android Mobile Device in the snow while fat tiring through the woods (never to be seen again, the phone, not the rider) and think: “This guy, again? Why am I on chat…”

Surprisingly, this idea only generates 40 or 50 emails. Pretty low for a thought shared on chat designed to turn into a ride for the CCBC members. A good sign! Or perhaps foreshadowing of something more dark?

These things always end the same. We ride. And so it was with the first ever IronKoot. Some call it IronKoot 1. Some call it IronKoot last. In either case, it was the first ever IronKoot of which you will never ever have the chance to participate. Perhaps you will have the opportunity to partake in IronKoot 2, 3, or more, but never the first. And you should be thankful for that.

But this is a report of the “ride”, not of the ride development, ride planning, and ride execution plan planning. On to the action!

The day of IronKoot One nears. We are into the 10 day forecast window of the various internet sites that repackage and sell as their own the weather forecast. And that repackaged drivel does not look good. As the day of the event moves closer and closer and the weather “forecasters” hysteria for rain grows, the darkness, foreshadowed many months earlier, looks more and more like truth. Nothing but the truth.

We are within 24 hours of the start of IronKoot 1. It will rain. And it will not be warm. And the wind will blow. Hard.

Oh.

But IRON is not a part of the IronKoot name for nothing. For we are the CCBC! IRON represents how we ride! Hard and fast with only a little bit of rust.  We shall meet and we shall ride!

We gather beneath the Flag of Flanders that represents strength and fortitude. Sunday morning. The pros are on the telly and if they can compete for 260K, the IronKoot can go on.

Oh the coffee is marvelous. The French toast (in honor of European cycling!) simply divine. The fruit cup amazing. But we must ride, for we are Chilikootians! Really, just how bad can it be? Certainly there will be a window we can sneak through?  

Oh.

Wait, is that an opening? Which way is that thing moving? Hurry, hit “map in motion”. We can sneak through there? Right?

And Liège Bastogne Liège 2014 continues. 3k to go. A small break with 10 seconds on the closing peloton. Tension grips the room and the Koots gaze out the window.

Oh.

And Liège comes to an end. An amazing finish. Dan Martin has fought across the gap to nearly claim the lead. They make a hard left to the finish line 100 meters away, wait - the video is much better: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zL_1de_2Pq4 (It’s only 17 seconds, go watch it.)

Oh.

And that road is dry.

We have a new champion in Liège. The Koots look around the room. “Oh, look at the time. I better get home.” “I probably should go.” Dirty dishes are quietly returned to cafe. Table and chairs put back into their home. The Kootians file out slowly into the rain. To their cars, with only the shame of not having ridden and some great coffee and breakfast in their stomachs.

The drive of shame back to home.

Oh.

We Kootians are a hearty lot! There will be another chance to redeem the shame of not riding in the 39F degree temps, through the 30mph (48Kph), and driving but still pouring rain. And we will all take solace in the fact that 1 among us rode at least a section of IronKoot One because he had hope and is bad at weather maps in motion. He thought that “Yes! Indeed there would be a break in the weather!”

Oh.

We are shamed. But, he was wrong, there was no break. There was but the hint of a break in the weather which lead to a US gallon of water stored in his tights. But he did ride and we did not.

And for that (not having ridden) we are DAMN HAPPY!

OH!!!

And Nick is your IronKoot One Most Valuable Rider(MVR)/Worst Weather Forecaster(WWF) 2014!