Le Call

It is la** time of the year when all over the internet you see nothing but stories of the world’s great cycling teams announcing their lineups for Le Tour. There is much talk of who can beat last years champion Mr. Froome. Everyone wonders if A. Contador will eat tainted Spanish beef. 

But, more importantly, it is the time of the year when J. Sully (me) waits for le CALL!

For those of you who follow the trials and tribulations of J. Sully (e.g. drop me), you know that for years, our hero, J. Sully (me) has been waiting for “The Call”. If you follow cycling and the race of the year, le Tour (the cool kids say it that way, maybe) you are familiar with “The Look” given from the “greatest” (in a physically/doped sense, not morally) rider in le Tour history to another infamous former “Champion” of what I consider one of the greatest athletic challenges of all time. (relive The Look, it really is amazing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MdMdJAdzpYQ at about 21 seconds), 

Yes, I’m still talking about the le Tour - where men wear tights and ride up the sides of mountains at a pace unimaginable to most. 

Le Call, in my mind, would be of the magnitude of Le Look!

The Call goes “something” like this:

J. Sully: “Hello?”

Unknown voice with accent, slightly harried: “Bonjour! Is this J. Sully?”

J. Sully: “Yes, Bonjour. Who is this?”

Unknown voice with accent, with slight relief in voice: “So wonderful to track you down. We need you! Le Tour begins in just a few days. Our lead out train is now short 1 man. Can you come?”

J. Sully: “Well, I do have work. And a bike club who depends on me on Saturdays.”

Unknown voice with accent: “But we need you. A 30 day contract. All the EPO you can use. Can you come?”

J. Sully, slightly hesitant: “Well, my French is not very good… and, as I said, my club, what about my club? I mean, the Coffee Ride...”

Unknown voice with accent cutting me off: “My friend! Jerseys! Bibs! Skin suits!! And an aero helmet too! We need you!”

In my (small) mind, for years now, I've dreamt of this call coming. As my years on this planet increase along with my cholesterol, my time to be called is shortening. Soon I will be as old as the riders in le Chilkoot Cycling Club who drop me every Saturday, and at that age, who's gonna call? I mean, besides the American Association of Retired Folks or whatever they're called.

So now is the time! Action is required! I am taking matters into my own hands! I am bringing the bike and bibs to them! If the mountains will not come to me, I will head to the mountains.

My friends I am off to Europe to show the world that NOW is the time for The Call. I will follow le Tour! I will ride the cobbles! I shall ride the mountains on Bastille Day! I shall be dropped by those from other lands! And I will send updates! (Um, sorry.)

In 2015... In the midst of June... The phone will ring:

J. Sully: "Hello, Bonjour!"

Heavily accented unknown caller, slightly bored: "Is this J. Sully? The J. Sully?"

J. Sully, now breathless: "Yes! Yes it is!!!"  

Heavily accented unknown caller: “Ah! We've found you. Would you care to cut your interest rate in HALF on your Visa?"

(jump to part 2 of this adventure)

(ps - I’ll put all the pics & video of my mission up elsewhere and try not to fill up chat. It’s bad enough having to watch me climb trying to catch you as you (thankfully) wait for me. I won’t force more of the same (looking, not waiting)!

** "Clever" use of French: https://translate.google.com/#fr/en/la